do it. create. walk and see. cut and paste. scratch and sniff.
do whatever you have to do to feed your soul.
this is my commitment.

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

what DIDN'T work


I was inspired this morning to wake up and tell the world what didn't work in 2013.  
This is also a good way of claiming what DID in a round-a-bout manner.

VIDEOS - When I first re-committed to this blog back in August of 2012, I learned quickly that "vlogs" were necessary in captivating an audience.  At that time, I was just pleased that I had something to say (I had so much to say) and that I was disciplined in the publishing of my posts.  It did always weigh in the back of my mind, though - that I would have to eventually figure out this video thing.  Well, I tried it for a very short duration.  I had fun trying, yes, but unless someone with all the equipment and know-how wants to volunteer to film, edit, etc, it's likely not going to happen anytime again in the near future.  For me, because I lack the skill in this department, it trips up my creative process.  I can get my point across much more quickly if I just write.  For now.

E-BOOK - One of my goals for 2013 was to write an e-book.  Why am I dragging my feet?  My latest read, The War of Art, is assisting in my answer to this.  Look for a book report on this soon!

TRYING HARDER - I have always been a hard, dedicated worker bee.  ALWAYS.  The only thing that is different about the last year and a half is that, for the first time, I am completely working for myself.  This is a lot of things and feelings all at once.  It is empowering, liberating, terrifying and can be full of self doubt.  I can experience all of these emotions over the course of an hour everyday.  It all depends on the hour and the day.  As a side note, I think I am getting better at managing all these things and feelings and have been able to create more of a distance between me and them so that I can keep on working.  In fact, if anything has happened this past year, this would be that something.  I do have a tendency to want to push, force and press, though.  Time after time I realize this doesn't work -  not ever.  This never works.  Have I emphasized this enough?  In fact, the harder I try to make something happen, the further I feel I push it away.  My new mantra for this year is to "let it come to me".  This doesn't mean I don't show up and do my work for the day.  What this does mean, though, is that I show up, be present, be the best I can be and then let go.  Difficult stuff (but I am up for the challenge).  It's a day by day process.



This is my second post regarding my 2013 reflections.
There will be more.  
You can read the first post here.

2 comments:

  1. I am SO grateful for what you share here. Totally WORKING for me! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

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    Replies
    1. BIG xo, fellow creative! Thank you for your encouragement : )

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