strong cultural conditioning

soul strength, 20x16
acrylic on canvas, 2017

For the last 23 years (AT LEAST), the way my life has worked out (for the better) has NOT made sense.  It doesn't fall according to the laws of logic.  And yet, I still try to operate this way most of the time.  Logic has a great hold onto the ditch of my life and keeps on pulling.

As an educator, I know to focus on developing students' strengths rather than placing any focus of their weaknesses.  Sooner or later, the strengths out win any weaknesses (or, at least keep the weaknesses manageable). But, what does our cultural programming say? WORK ON THOSE WEAKNESSES.  Place our focus THERE.  If we place our focus there, our strengths NEVER get any attention.  Then what happens?  We're all walking around not living in our true potential and still, just getting by, focusing on those weaknesses that, by the way, NEVER  are conquered.  Not ever.  They are our weaknesses, for crying out loud!

I don't know how to insert a table/grid here and I don't want to take the time right now to figure that out.  I just want to say a few basic things:

• Why do we spend our time pointing out weaknesses rather than pointing out strengths?
• Why do we spend our energy trying to curb weaknesses rather than develop strengths?
• Why do we preach the hustle, chase, "make things happen" attitude rather than learn to practice/develop patience, trust, letting things unfold, flow?
• Why, on earth, do we focus on what all of that outside stuff looks like rather than focus on emotional stability or "soundness"?

I studied Taoist philosophy in college and it really resonated with me.  It still does.  I continue to circle back to taoism.  But my point here, is, why do I have to circle back?  Why can't I just STAY HERE? Maintain a taoist state of mind?

Because the cultural programming is relentless for me.  It's a constant inner battle for me to stay the course of what resonates with me, what I believe and what works for me.  I mean, I have proof! and I still default to the cultural messaging (that NEVER worked for me anyway).  

I guess to be a taoist, I need to practice self compassion first.  With compassion comes acceptance.  And then I can remind myself it doesn't matter how many times I start (again), it just matters that I start. And it takes SOUL STRENGTH