crossroads

visual journal entry: "my road: carefree, imposed limitation + unconscious freedom,

unlearning + relearning, movement + possibility, big stop"

Crossroads or Dead end?

I vote for crossroads but I feel as though I am at a dead end.

One thing's for sure: I am unclear of any other paths available and I am absolutely sure I want to consciously make a clear decision - no more "experimental" roads. I know what I need and want but am unable to know how to provide this - which is why I feel at the end of this road. I am waiting for the next direction to be made clear and yet, I am unwilling to pave my own way. I want the road to be clear. The road can be unfamiliar. It can (will) have pot holes and speed bumps. The road doesn't need to be established. It can be built as I go, but it needs to meet my needs (and desires) in one way or another as I travel. I am not willing to settle for less. I have settled for less in a lot of ways in my past and I am no longer willing to do so. Life is too short and too precious. What will my next path be? Where will I get "my break"? My break into an authentic life lived with clarity, prosperity and vision? I have worked on creating a strong foundation over the last 10 years and I do feel I will soon be able to lift off to higher ground.

How, where or when this will happen is unclear.

I need to stay clear, present, available to noticing.

I need to commit to standing still at the end of this road, waiting for the new one to begin...somewhere...